66270

6265

qrieves:

"lol chill Hazel Grace it’s a metaphor"

image

(via assbuttofasgard)

37692

thorxndor:

I was sitting on my friends bed with her when she came out as gay

and I was looking through a Chinese food pamphlet

so I put it down, looked at her and said “I was going to suggest ordering food but I see now you’d prefer to eat out”

and I don’t think she’s ever really forgave me  

(via klissme)

69117

jill-bird:

You see Spongebob,  It’s a metaphor. You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but never give it the power to kill you.

50535

realniggaannouncements:

I had a dream last night that Jesus finally resurrected and when white people found out he wasn’t white they arrested him for 2000 something years of tax evasion  

(via whatacuriouslifewehavefound)

30599

212360

"Women are afraid of meeting a serial killer. Men are afraid of meeting someone fat."

When Strangers Click, a 2011 documentary about online dating (via rawfuel)

(Source: tealeafprincess, via loxapine)

67317

Anonymous: Are you interested in boys or girls?

clamjob:

18993

disarms:

blazin??? more like prayzin stay in church

(via thecultofragini)

266369

unsuccessfulmetalbenders:

EVERY SINGLE EASTER MY MOTHER HIDES A THREE POUND EASTER EGG IN THE HOUSE AND SETS MY BROTHERS AND I OFF TO GO FIND IT AND GUESS WHO GOT IT FOR THE FOURTH CONSECUTIVE YEAR IN A ROW

image

NOT THOSE LIL BITCHES

(via i-wanna-be-a-starship-companion)